Die 3 Prinzipien in Deutsch

11156737_10206273706339122_1325046971_nHeute hat mich jemand gefragt of ich die 3 Prinzipien auf Deutsch erklären könnte. Das ist gar nicht so einfach, zumal ich schon seit 33 Jahren im Ausland lebe und mein Deutsch ziemlich brüchig geworden ist – wie ein alter Landungssteg am See! Viele Ausdrücke kenne ich gar nicht auf Deutsch. Ich hoffe, meine Umschreibungen sind verständlich. Über die Grammatik will ich gar nicht erst reden!

Der Grundgedanke ist zu verstehen wie wir als Menschen ‘funktionieren’, dass wir leben, und wie unsere Gefühle generiert werden. Das erste Prinzip baut darauf auf das wir leben, dass es eine Energy gibt die genau andeutet of wir leben oder nicht mehr leben. Das kann man Natur nennen, oder Gott, oder Universelle Energie, Sydney Banks, der diese Gedanken zuerst formulierte hat den Ausdruck MIND genommen um neutral diese Lebensenergie zu beschreiben.

Zuerst müssen wir gewahr werden das jedes Gefühl, jede Sensation die wir im Körper verspüren, von einem Gedankenprozess verursacht wird. Von Langeweile, über Depression, zu Freude, Angst, Hunger, Schmerz, oder Ärger, nichts passiert in unserem Körper ohne das unsere sinn-machenden Gehirnprozesse es in Bewegung setzen und dirigieren. Im englischen benutzen wir für die sinn-machenden Prozesse das Word “THOUGHT”, das zweite Prinzip. Es beschreibt nicht nur einen konkreten Gedanken,sondern auch unsere Kapazität zu denken.

Was auch immer unsere Sinne in uns oder von unserer Umwelt wahrnehmen, diese ‘rohen Daten’ wird von unseren sinn-machenden Gehirnprozessen vor dem Hintergrund unserer lebenslangen Erinnerungen und Erfahrungen interpretiert und dann als Körpersensationen sozusagen an unser Bewusstsein weitergeben. Unsere Fähigkeit bewusst zu werden von inneren und äußeren Vorgängen ist das dritte Prinzip, CONSCIOUSNESS in Englisch. Das Problem mit unserem Bewusstsein und Wahrnehmungsvermögen is jedoch dass es nicht sehr zuverlässig ist und IMMER auf Interpretation aufbaut, was sehr subjektiv ist. Wir nehmen mehr wahr was wir wahrnehmen wollen und nicht was wirklich in der Welt wahrzunehmen ist.

Das sind die 3 Grundbausteine unserer Existenz: Ohne die Lebensenergie gibt es keine Gedanken und keine Wahrnehmung; ohne Gedanken können wir nicht am Leben teilnehmen (z.b. jemand im Koma).

Die Frage, die mir gestellt wurde ist: wie man dieses Verständnis anwenden kann, wie es helfen kann, was man da machen muss. Die Antwort: man muss gar nichts machen sondern nur verstehen. Sobald wir erkennen das unsere Gefühle nicht von unseren Umständen herkommen, sondern von WIE WIR über unsere Umstände denken, dass wir die Gefühle selbst generieren, können wir uns zurücksetzen und sagen “Ach, wieder mal ein dummer Gedanke” und es nicht so wichtig nehmen. Nur weil wir etwas denken meint nicht das es auch wahr und wichtig ist. Wir haben zwischen 50.000 und 200.000 Gedanken am Tag, viele von denen sind ziemlich sinnlos und banal.

Wenn ich denke “Ach es ist ja nur ein Gedanke” dann werde ich nicht von der Gefühlsspirale in die Tiefe gezogen. Und je weniger aufgewühlt mein Zustand ist, je klarer und weiser sind meine Gedanken und Entscheidungen. Um dass zu erreichen versuche ich so oft und lange wie möglich in meiner ‘Wohlsein-Zone” zu sein. Gedanken die mich da herauslocken vermeide ich so oft wie möglich. Das gelingt zwar nicht immer, aber mit der Zeit immer öfter. Übung macht den Meister :). In der Wohlseins-Zone sind meine Gedanken ruhig und gelassen, da geniesse ich den Augenblick, sehe was gut ist, wertschätze was ich habe. In dem Zustand erlebe ich Frieden, Weisheit, und allgemeines Wohlsein.

Wenn Gedanken mich in den “Keller” geleitet haben und ich ärgerlich, ängstlich, depressive ….usw. bin, versuche ich so gut wie möglich meine Gedanken zu beruhigen um zurück in die Wohlseins-Zone zu kommen. Egal wie lange es dauert. Keller-Gedanken sind qualitative nicht sehr gut. (Stell Dir mal jemanden in einem Wutanfall vor. Was da aus dem Mund kommt ist selten von Wert oder reflektiert Weisheit)! Ich versuche keine wichtigen Entscheidungen zu treffen wenn ich im “Keller” bin, sondern warte bis meine Gedanken sich beruhigt haben und dann schaue ich mir das Problem an, das den Sturzflug verursacht hat. In der Wohlseins-Zone ist Weisheit, Überblick, Mitgefühl, Liebe, und Frieden…eine gute Grundlage für weise Entscheidungen.

Dass ist die Essenz. Wie es mir hilft? Ich fühle mich meistens sehr wohl, rege mich kaum über Sachen auf. Mein allgemeiner Stresspegel ist sehr niedrig. Es geht mir gesundheitlich besser, und meine Beziehungen zu anderen Menschen sind einfacher geworden. Ich nehme sehr wenig persönlich. Wenn jemand unhöflich zu mir ist, weiss ich dass es nichts mit mir zu tun hat, sondern das die Person gerade in ‘ihrem/seinem Keller’ ist. Ich habe selten das Bedürfnis recht zu haben. Ich weiss dass wir alle unsere eigene, persönliche Realität haben, und dass es nicht anders sein kann. Es gibt nicht die letztendliche Wahrheit. Wir können nur unsere persönliche Interpretation von unserer Wahrheit sehen.

How can I stop negative Feelings?

I am running about 15 courses each year, basically addressing how we think, feel, and behave often in ways that don’t serve us – instead getting us into some form of trouble. And each time we unpack how negative feelings, feeling bad, stressed, or depressed actually harm not only our physical body but our relationships, our careers, our mental, and our emotional health, I am asked the same question over and over again: Then how can I/we stop negative feelings?

So let me turn the question around to see if I am making sense: What happens to your when you look at the picture below?

Title: Cut lemons     Owner: Helen in Wales

You saw the picture and …….? Salivated! Could you have stopped it? I don’t think so. You saw the lemons, your personal mind went into your memory bank confirmed “it’s lemons” and associated smell and taste and your body reacted to these recalled thoughts. This is not much different with all feelings we have, either negative or positive. All we are dealing with is THOUGHT. We ‘think’ lemons and our body reacts. We think we are lost or abandoned, we react with fear (unless we are Indiana Jones, then we might get excited).

Can we stop feeling fear? No, not as long as we are thinking fearful thoughts. That’s just how we are built. Only when our mind gives us the ‘All Clear’ signal will the fear subside.

You can’t stop negative or bad feelings you have. When you become conscious of them they are already there. You have already thought them and thereby brought them into existence. All you can do is to know they are just thoughts and not take them so serious. That might be easier when you look at the lemon above than when you are lost in the jungle, but the principle is the same. We always feel what we think.

The next question would then come as predictable as the night follows the day: How can we stop thinking these unhelpful things. That will have to be covered in future posts, because we need to do some groundwork about thinking first.

Those of you who want to know more about it (all in one place) can read up on it in my book Delicious Love Forever: Recipes for Lasting Loving Relationships or the 2nd in the series: Delicious Mind, Body, and Soul: Recipes for Pampering Yourself Back to Health. Both are available as downloadable kindle version and now also as paperback.

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Interview: Relationships and the 3 Principles

When you feel passionate about something you probably like to talk about it. Well, I certainly do. So it was a great day for me when Donna K. Fitch, author of ‘Second Death’ interviewed me about writing the book ‘Delicious Love Forever’, what made me write about relationships and combine my understanding of the 3 Principles and recipes.

We had lots of fun – You can listen to the 2-part interview (each about 15 minutes) by clicking on the links below!

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Photo by Beverly & Pack

Part 1

Part 2

3 Main Areas of Stress and How to Deal With Them

origin_3345896050Today I am visiting my friend Jan Moore’s blog on my virtual book tour and talk about the problem of STRESS. Jan’s passion is an interesting one: How women from the baby boom period can still be productive yet work in a job that is ‘right’ for us. Working on our own terms! It’s worth having a look at her work and, while you are there, check out my guest post about stress and how to deal with it, make a comment, have a chat and a cuppa! 🙂

In our modern world, everyone seems to struggle with stress. Stress is perceived when people are stuck on the motorway, have to see their boss, when the TV breaks down, the favourite sports team loses the championship, a meal is ruined, a dress torn, a neighbour’s dog relieves himself in one’s front yard, or when they have to give a public speech.

And even though those incidents are not life threatening situations, people often act as if. Their bodies are drowning in the same chemicals our far far away ancestors experienced when they were in danger to be eaten by a sabre tooth tiger. And while our ancestors stress response would go down to normal as soon as the danger was over, that is not the case for today’s people. Many don’t get back to baseline but experience stress chronically…….. Read more here! 

photo (6)Gudrun Frerichs, PhD is a therapist, author, and life-long explorer of the mysteries of the human mind. She is retiring from mental health and trauma work and has published now her first book Delicious Love Forever.  She is passionate about applying the Principles of Mind, Thought, and Consciousness, as formulated by the late Sydney Banks, not only to her books but also to everyday living situations.

A Beautiful Mind

origin_6187834483Ah, I loved that movie. What a moment when it becomes clear that the oddness and social awkwardness is not all there is, but that his mind is perceiving things that are not shared by others. What we forget is that this is true for all of us. The beauty of the movie is to see how he prospers and can find some peace of mind when he realises that his thoughts are NOT TRUE. They don’t reflect reality. What an interesting concept.

I have been invited by Helena Kalivoda to post an article on her website as part of my virtual book tour promoting my new book Delicious Love Forever: Recipes for Lasting Loving Relationships. Thought, and how our thinking can be helping us as well as – often – trip us up, is discussed in my book at length.   Read more here  and have a chat with us! 🙂

 

 

 

Our Thoughts Create Our World

time passAs part of my ‘virtual book tour’ where I introduce my new book Delicious Love Forever: Recipes for Lasting, Loving Relationships, I have written about how thoughts create our world for my friend Linda’s blog.

That our thoughts create our world – like our concept of time for example – is of course not something that I came up with. No. Not at all. Much wiser thinkers than I have known that for thousands of years. – – – In the contrary! For most of my life I have believed that there is a reality out there for us to discover. And even now, knowing that we are the creator of the reality we perceive, it’s hard sometimes to ‘believe my own knowing’. Such is the fallacy of how our personal mind works.  Read more here

 

Resonance sets the tone in your relationships

origin_6985104241The interesting part of a virtual book tour is that the reader is presented with a wide range of topics and ideas, sometimes viewed from a different angle than they are used to from. To learn something new we need to be able to view a situation from all sorts of different angles. Today I have the pleasure to introduce my colleague and author Linda Easthouse. Linda has an interesting background as Natural Health Therapist and her post about relationships is based on her rich background in a variety of holistic disciplines.

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Relationships can be stressful. Whether the relationship is with your spouse, partner or children where intensity can spiral rapidly, or whether it is at work with colleagues, the boss, and clients, where stress keeps you tied in knots for hours at a time, relationships wear on us. Our relationships can be a wonderful reservoir of encouragement and strength when they are healthy but in our modern world it seems that many relationships turn toxic and strain our inner resources to manage them.

It does take two to tango and relationships always have two, or often more, sides to them, but you can only be responsible for your side of the equation. That is not to say that you are at “fault” when a relationship breaks down or is very stressful; however you have more power than you know. It is within you to change the character of the relationship by changing yourself.  Please don’t misinterpret what I am saying to mean that you should be a doormat and just give in to appease the others or put up with bad behavior with a smile on your face and pretend it doesn’t matter. It does matter. However, you have the resources to change the relationship using the concept of resonance.

Resonance is like the ripples in a pool of water. If you drop a stone in one end and someone else drops a stone in the other, the ripples eventually meet and become something different.  Where they meet is your relationship. When you change the size or shape of the rock or the angle at which you drop it in, the ripple changes so that when it meets the ripple from the other end, the meeting creates a different wave. Your job, your child, your finances may not have changed, but if you do, your rock changes and what you send out to meet those other things creates a different response. When the response is different, it allows the other rock space to initiate changes too. When you send out a different vibe, you get a different response. If you can stop dropping in rocks of fear and anger or frustration, then the other side will have the wiggle room to try a different stone. Your change affects them and causes changes in response. Be the change. The responses may be slow and almost imperceptible at the beginning, but others will respond differently and you will start to receive back a wave more in tune with your own.

So let’s explore Resonance a little more. This is just a basic sketch of the core principles of resonance but it will give a step onto a new path the leads to healthy relationships.

What you send out is what you get back.

People that we end up living and working with are people that we have drawn into our circle by our subconscious vibrations. It is very much like the animal response of when a wolf smells fear in the prey, they attack. If they don’t smell fear in the prey they are much more wary and keep their distance.  If you generate fear from your subconscious level you are inviting predator type people to attack you. Most often that leads to verbal attacks, over burdening you at work, expecting you to do everything while they sit back and criticize, and it spirals down from there. As you deal with your own fears of value and self-worth, as you become a person who sees your own worth and knows how to set boundaries, you will be perceived differently. It may mean that you change jobs or let go of some friends and social circles. You will draw to you and be attracted to places and people that resonate or vibrate at the level that you do. As you clean up the garbage in your own life, you will naturally gravitate to people who have a cleaner emotional environment as well. You will also allow those around you to make similar changes and let go of their need to be controlling or nasty. Be the person that brings out the best in others by being the best in yourself.

Dont take personally what others do.

I know from very personal experience that when one of my children is going through a tough time and acting out, I used to take it personally. I would blame myself for not being a good enough parent, for not providing what they needed, for whatever excuse appeared. That is a recipe for disastrous relationships and it doesn’t help my child. I can only live my life and provide unconditional love and compassion along with good training in thinking skills, social manners, and personal growth. Beyond that he is responsible for himself. As long as I let him put the blame on me and not take his own responsibility for his actions, I am preventing us both from growing. It works in the home, the sports team, the office, and anywhere else. Don’t let others suck you into the feeling that you are to blame for their behavior or short falls. If someone is having a bad day and reacting poorly, don’t try to rescue them. Give them compassion, refrain from judgment, and recognize that their bad day doesn’t have to wreck yours. Don’t get sucked into their vortex of pain and dysfunction just because they are physically present around you.  Keep your resonance up at a level that serves you.

Find your center point and keep the grounding wire plugged in.

Have you ever been in an old house or somewhere in a less developed part of the world where houses and electric plugs aren’t grounded? You probably discovered that it is pretty easy to get a shock off of nearly anything and you have to be very careful plugging and unplugging things. The grounding wire dissipates the static electricity down into the ground so that it doesn’t build up and shock someone. The same applies to your emotions. There is friction and electric fields that build up in personal relationships. When one or both of you are grounded and balanced that friction drains off and is dissipated so that it doesn’t create shocks and sparks between you. We do actually have an electric circuit with the earth’s electric circuit and literally need to be grounded, especially in our world of electronic soup that we live it. But just as important, we have an emotional and spiritual circuit with creation and the creator. It also needs to be grounded. When we maintain a centered, plugged in relationship between ourselves and the source of all light and power, we are able to ground out and dissipate the static in the relationships around us. Things just don’t flare and spark the same way. Your resonance will be smooth and gentle with shielded wires and good grounding.

Relationships don’t have to be stressful even when others around you are stressed and reactive. As you create the person you want to be by releasing your own fears and self-sabotaging behaviors, facing the underlying panic buttons, and pushing the reset button on your own life, you will surround yourself with people and situations that nurture and regenerate you.

Watch from my forthcoming book, Pushing the reset button: a guide to creating a life you love, to be released in Oct.  In the meantime, to learn more about turning off the panic button, establishing resonance, and generally removing stress from your life please check out my blog at Easthouse Natural Health Centre.

To thank Gudrun from hosting me today please download my gift to you, 3 Common Problems all Professionals Face that keep them Struggling with Exhaustion, Feeling Sick all the time & Constantly Popping Pills or Vitamins (and what to do about them).

About Linda Easthouse

Linda has been a trainer, educator, and health advocate all her life. With 10 years of experience as a Natural Health Therapist, she helps people regain wellness. As a certified Practitioner of Health Kinesiology, and Matrix Energetics, using hands-on therapies that restore the body, mind, and spirit, she assists people to take control of their health, establish healthy patterns, and gain control over their stresses. Linda founded East House Natural Health and sees clients in both Calgary and Abbotsford and teaches in western Canada. She has a Master’s degree and many years of apprenticeship in the healing arts under a variety of teachers. Linda loves to share the Road to Health with people of all ages.

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Gudrun is a therapist, author, and life-long explorer of the mysteries of the human mind. She is retiring from mental health and trauma work and has published now her first book Delicious Love Forever.  She is passionate about applying the Principles of Mind, Thought, and Consciousness, as formulated by the late Sydney Banks, not only to her books but also to everyday living situations.
 

The Positive Mind: Virtual Book Tour

photo (1)We all know that those of us who have a positive attitude to life, other people, and our work, will be significantly happier and more content than those who see problems, obstacles, and unpleasantness wherever they look. Now, there are many ways to achieve that. How to achieve a positive mind based on the Three Principles of Mind, Thought, and Consciousness is the topic of a new blog-post I have written for my colleague PaTrisha-Anne Todd from Coaching Leads to Success.

The piece is actually an excerpt from my new book Delicious Love Forever: Recipes for Lasting Loving Relationships.  This book is  filled with common sense, wisdom, and simple concepts based on the premises that we all create our own, personal reality through the 3

principles of Mind, Thought, and Consciousness. Following these, readers are encouraged to (re)-discover how get in touch with their innate ability to create a positive state of mind and lasting, loving relationships. This is enhanced with some delicious recipes, and tackles at the same time the root cause for relationship problems. Solutions are offered people can easily try out for themselves. Indeed, a holistic ‘meal’ that feeds mind, body, and soul! Continue reading “The Positive Mind: Virtual Book Tour”

Only One Step to Happiness: End of Story

rel ships happyOver the last 20 years positive psychology and positive thinkers have suggested that by simply following a number of steps ‘Happiness’ is in our grasp. Who would not like the idea?  But wait a minute …. if there were only 3, 5, or 7 steps to Happiness, would people not have achieved it by now? People are not stupid – at least not the majority. So what is wrong with the picture?

Happiness is not a commodity, a trade-able good that can be acquired by following a prescribed formula – like how to start your car’s engine. Continue reading “Only One Step to Happiness: End of Story”

The Art of Listening

woman-listening“Most people do not listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply.”  This quote from Stephen R. Covey (The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change) describes succinctly the problem most people have when communicating. Most courses and trainings refer to ‘active listening’ as a desirable practice, yet it teaches people to listen to the words, the content, and then repeat it back to the speaker.

In contrast, deep listening as I understand it is listening for the meaning behind the words, is listening for the feeling that the words are pointing it. In a way, it is listening with a sense or curiosity WITHOUT checking with our own mind whether it makes sense to us, we can relate to it, whether it is stupid/reckless/naive to name just a few examples. If we would listen that way (checking with our own mind) we would only listen to our own thoughts about something and not to the other person. Continue reading “The Art of Listening”